Having a family member that is suffering from drug or alcohol abuse can be extremely painful. As hard as it is for the family, it is harder for the addict. It is vital for family members to be part of the addict's recovery process. There is no other way to make it work. Enabling the addict to continue in their ways only reinforces their addiction. Ignoring the problem certainly will not bring the addict to confront his own problems either. As painful as it may be, ultimately the family holds the key to the addict's recovery.

Alcohol or drug addicts cause their family pain and embarrassment, and sometimes abuse. It is extraordinarily difficult to live with the addict, and imperative to confront him and encourage him to go to a structured drug or alcohol rehabilitation center. While the addict is in the rehab center, it is important to offer him love, encouragement, and acceptance. The work is yet to come; when the addict will arrive back home, leaving behind the solid, supportive environment at the rehab center, the family will have to band together to form a supportive wall around the addict. Old friends of the addict who may be destructive to him by virtue of their own addictions or other bad influences must be shut out.

The success of the former addict depends entirely on his support system. The family must keep a drug-free and alcohol-free environment to enable his success. All temptation presents an opportunity for relapse. Sometimes this can take its toll on the family, for example at a family event no alcohol may be served, and when eating out the family should take care not to order dishes with alcoholic ingredients. The family cannot own and store alcohol in the home and cannot go out to pubs or bars. Even a beer is not innocent when near a recovering addict.

Often an addict's family becomes dysfunctional as a result of the addict's behavior. Family members may become codependent, which means that they develop certain destructive coping mechanisms to protect themselves from the stressful situation at home. They may become controlling, develop low self-esteem, or be in denial. When the addict returns from rehab and is functioning well, the codependent may need help also because the balance in the house is returning to normal. As the substance-dependent family member improves, the codependent family member may deteriorate. The codependent will need to learn how to function independently without continuing his self-destructive behavior now that the situation is not dysfunctional. It goes without saying that the codependent must heal in order to help recreate a healthy balance at home for the sake of the recovering addict. The family as a whole must begin fresh under these new and improved circumstances.